Merry Christmas: What its all about.

What a great time of the year. I can publicly proclaim that I celebrate the day that Jesus was born to die and its ok in cultures eyes, that is such a blessing. Our actions should reflect that but they rarely do. I love the family time that this season offers for us, it is often a rare treat, and hopefully not taken for granted. But back to my point, Christmas is blatantly about Jesus Christ. It is in celebration of his humble birth to an unwed teenage girl in a stable, the God of the universe came under those terms, real life terms.

As I sit restless in the early hours of Christmas day I want to remind myself that Christmas is not the gift buying/getting excuse to spend money machine bur rather Christmas is an attempt at an analogy. An analogy were material gifts ar ment to represent the gift that we have been presented with. A gift that is greater than any other, more valuable than a mountain of gold or a sea of rubies, that is the gift of a relationship with God. Restoration of the connection between God and man. A new covenant that will never fail or pass away. He is our gift and our salvation.

As I savor the evening that laughs, the food, the music, the time spent with my little cousins and all the memories of the night I hope that after all is said and done we remember what this time of the year is really about. It is not about what the media wants it to be: all about family, putting on a smile, and treating the ones you love to things they may not deserve (or can afford). These things are not bad in and of themselves but focusing on them primarily devalues Christ as honored in this season and elevates them to idol status. Whether we want to believe it or not we can worship our own families above God. All these things are wonderful things when celebrated in the freedom found in Christ. I love my family and cannot wait to spend Christmas and the rest of this season around them. My mother and father have given me a life that should be the envy of any man and my sister is the best in the world. We are not the poster family but we love each other furiously and that is what makes us so wonderful, I am thankful for them above all things that I have been physically blessed with. I am glad that home can be such a perfect place for rest and restoration.

Merry Christmas,
Jacob

p.s. praying for a white Christmas!

This Year

Oct. 24 Mary Sue Edwards passed away. It was a Sunday morning and I had got up late for church. On my way to the door I was greeted by my friend Manny. It was uncommon for me to see him on a Sunday morning and there was a grave look in his eye. It was a numb feeling, it was not a sharp pain that one might think it would be, more of a swelling friction that slowly overshadowed me. He offered me a ride back home, we rode in silence. It was a hard day but everyone in my family had to get through it. This Christmas will be the first without a grandparent on my mothers side. This year my be the last year that my family spends Christmas Eve at Mama Sue's house.

Today I wrote a song that really displays my emotions regarding Christmas:

We sleep beneath the red and white
we read under the Christmas lights 
and from that subtle glow 
we think and now we know 
it the end of the year 
and the first one without you we'll know 


We will carry on, we'll send our love in song to you
like the baby Jesus Christ you came down here to die
this year 
we're sure now of a time when you'll hold your hand in our's again 
on an eternal shore no goodbyes anymore 
like this year 


We will sing our Christmas songs 
keep joy inside our broken hearts 
when we read those words aloud 
we'll know without a doubt 
there's a love that cannot die 
and he lives in you and I
this year


- Merry Christmas

Nearing an end, facing a new beginning.

Its so funny how we look forwards at the future of our lives and see hurdles and when we look backwards into the past of our lives as chapters. I guess it varies alot from person to person on how they view it but I still think it is so peculiar how we like to section up our lives. We really do long for some kind of order of things even the most unorganized of people say that they are growing into who they are to be, this says that  at some point you are more like you would want to be, or as others say "destined to be," than another point in history. There is no way to escape these sectioning times in our time here on this earth, there are defining moments. There was once a time were we confronted with a decision and made the right decision or the wrong one. It is by these decisions, no matter what the outcome, our lives are written.

I am fast approaching a fork in the road. I can see it splitting far ahead but for now I will pray that when I arrive there God keep me walking forward without so much as a hitch in my step. And if I need to turn around its ok, its a beautiful walk even when I am wrong.

"Its not the long walk home that will heal this heart but the welcome I receive with a Restart" ~Mumford and Sons 

So begins my life of worship.

As I begin into this realm of blogging or online journaling, whatever it may be, I hope it may be an aid for myself and others to grow closer to Christ. If that is not its end result or even why I start this thing then it is in vain. I hope for this blog to be a place of growth for myself where I can pour out my thoughts, and pour out my heart.

I will be honest that I am broken and I am in need of Christ more desperately every day. If this is just a tool to fuel my own pride I hope that it is struck down and my words are not heard. I want to God to do great things with my life and whatever is a hindrance to me should rightly be cut out.

Those who know me to some degree, know that music fuels alot of my actions. I am often found guitar in hand almost pretending to have written some great song often belonging to Scott and Seth Avett or John Mark McMillan. I like them believe that music penetrates us as humans. That God made us in such a way that we can comunicate through notes played on a guitar or words carefully crafted to elicit a certain emotion. Although I love music and what it can do to our hearts, I know that there is something greater than music; that music is not the answer. It is easy to get lost in the music and let ourselves believe that the answer to our purpose may lie in music but once again we are looking at a sign of our creator and not actually looking to our Mighty God as we should. Our lives should be our worship and music should naturally flow out of that same source, in this light it makes sense. It is just an appropriate response to what has already been done and what God is doing currently in our lives; looking towards a future with Him.

In short, so begins my life of worship.